Gentlemen In Distress
by foobar137
Summary: Phineas and Ferb have been captured by the evil Professor Poofenplotz, who wants to steal their fashion design skills. It's up to Candace and Isabella to get them back.


**Trope Bingo: character in distress**

**Timeline: summer of the show.**

* * *

"CURSE YOU, PINKY THE CHIHUAHUA!" Professor Poofenplotz shouted as the small dog parachuted away from her lair. With a deep sigh, she looked around the shambles the agent had made. Her latest plan had been torn apart again, and she had to start from scratch. Just another day in the life of an evil scientist.

She couldn't bear to clean yet, so she found herself staring out the window, not really seeing the traffic going by beneath. _Why do I even bother?_ she thought. _Upstaged by a chihuahua. Again._

She turned on her television and sat on the couch. A fashion show came on, so she leaned forward to catch details. She might find the style that would make her perfect, she thought.

The fashions being shown were innovative and beautiful, and she saw several that would look superb on her. There was a cream-and-purple outfit that would be positively divine. Eagerly, she awaited word on who the designers were.

The camera cut to two pre-teen boys, one with bright red hair and a long, pointy nose, and the other with bright green hair and a large, square nose. She was astounded to discover that they were the designers, but indeed, the green-haired boy was wearing cream and purple as well.

_Clever boys. Perhaps they'd help me out with...suitable incentive._

She smiled. An evil plan had occurred to her. And this time, Pinky the Chihuahua wouldn't be able to stop her. She had work to do for tomorrow.

* * *

"So, what do you want to do today, Ferb?" Phineas asked his brother, sitting next to him against the tree in their backyard.

Ferb shrugged indifferently.

"Yeah, me either. Maybe somebody will come by with an idea," Phineas replied.

An older woman came through the gate into the back yard. She was tall, and had white hair that looked like it had been firmly set in place. The smile on her face was more than a bit disconcerting.

"Hello, boys," she said.

"Hello, ma'am," Phineas said. "I'm Phineas, and this is my brother, Ferb. Who are you?"

The woman pulled a small perfume atomizer from her purse. "Your new mistress, boys," she said, and sprayed the bottle in his face. The acrid smell made his eyes blur, and he coughed, deep coughs that wracked his body. Then his eyelids drooped, and the world went black.

* * *

Isabella made sure her bow was in place just perfectly, and opened the gate to the Flynn-Fletcher backyard, Pinky at her heels. "Hey, Phineas! What'cha...doin'?" she trailed off as she went through the gate. Phineas and Ferb weren't in the backyard. She walked over to the glass door into the kitchen, to see if they were inside, but they weren't there either.

Candace saw her, and quickly opened the door. "What are you two up to?" she asked as she jumped out into the backyard. "You two are so...busted? Where are they?"

"I was just about to ask you the same thing," Isabella said.

"They came out here half an hour ago," Candace said. "I'd figured they'd be just at the point where they were doing something bustable by now."

"That's weird. They don't usually just vanish. Maybe they turned themselves invisible?"

"That's it!" Candace yelled. "Okay, boys, that's fun, now where are you?"

There was no response. Pinky sniffed around the tree, but didn't seem to find anything.

"Candace, this isn't like them," Isabella said, concerned.

"I agree. We need to find them, and bring them back here, so they can do...those things...and then I can bust them. But how do we find out what happened to them?"

Isabella thought for a moment. "Can I borrow your phone?"

"Sure, but why?"

"Trust me on this." Isabella dialed the number for Irving.

"C...C...Candace!" Irving answered the phone. "It's an honor..."

"It's Isabella, Irving. I'm borrowing Candace's phone. Did you see where Phineas and Ferb went this morning?"

"I haven't looked at this morning's footage yet," the voice on the phone said.

"Check it and get back to me."

"Bringing it up now...hey! Some old woman came into the backyard, sprayed something into their faces, and carried them off in a weird-looking helicopter."

"Can you see where she went?"

There was a pause on the other end of the line, then Irving said, "Nope. Sorry."

"Thanks, Irving."

"When you rescue them, tell them how much I helped, okay?"

"I will. Bye." She hung up the phone and looked at Candace. "Some woman kidnapped them and took them away in a helicopter. We need to find them."

Candace nodded enthusiastically. "So what do we do?"

Isabella thought for a second, then looked around. "Hey, where's Pinky?"

* * *

Pinky landed in the pink seat with a thump, and the viewscreen turned on.

"Good morning, Agent Pinky," Admiral Acronym said. "We have an extremely difficult assignment for you today. Professor Poofenplotz has captured these two boys." A picture of Phineas and Ferb appeared in the corner of the screen, and Pinky gasped. "As you can see, they're your host family's neighbors, so if they see you, your cover would be blown."

Pinky nodded and shivered in his seat.

"Your mission is to free these boys, and stop whatever diabolical plan she intends to use them for, without blowing your cover. Good luck, Agent Pinky."

Pinky saluted the screen, jumped out of his seat, and grabbed his jetpack.

* * *

Phineas blinked at the bright light in the perfume-scented room as he woke up. His eyes felt puffy, and his head felt as if it were it were full of cotton. A foul taste at the back of his mouth lingered.

"Oh, good, you're awake," the old woman's voice said, and his eyes reluctantly focused on her. She was leaning over him, giving him a sharp-edged smile. "I'd like to thank you both for...volunteering...to help me today."

"Wait, we didn't volunteer for anything!" Phineas said, looking around. The room was round and decorated in a modern style, with clean minimalist furniture. In the center of the room, a large pedestal held a crystal sphere with a hint of blue in it. Ferb was next to him, wearing a gaudy necklace. Phineas reached up and found a similar one around his own neck; the necklace tingled when he touched it.

"That's fine," the woman said. "You'll help me anyway. Stand up." The large crystal pulsed blue, and Ferb's necklace shone to match.

Phineas stood up, as did Ferb. "Hey, wait a minute..."

"You must obey me, boys. These necklaces are part of my plan to take over the world, but I need to look my best first. You're going to help."

"No we won't!" Phineas cried. "We're leaving!" He turned, and felt a searing pain around his neck. He fell to his knees, trying to take it off, but his hands wouldn't go near the catch.

"Yes." The old woman grinned viciously. "You will. Let's get started, shall we?" She opened a cabinet, revealing a collection of fabric. "Make me _gorgeous_."

* * *

"Sorry, Chief, we didn't see either of them anywhere," Gretchen said. The rest of the troop behind her shook their heads and shrugged. Isabella had sent them out to comb the area, unsuccessfully. "Any other ideas?"

Isabella took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "Go check again. Candace and I will search the backyard again looking for clues."

"You got it, Chief!" The troop scattered, leaving Isabella alone with Candace.

"I don't believe it. I'll never get to bust them," Candace said, sitting against the tree, rocking with her arms wrapped around her legs.

"We'll find them, Candace. They must have left something we can use. Maybe..." she looked up, spotting the small shed in the corner of the backyard. "Let's see if there's anything inside S.H.E.D. we can use!"

"Okay," Candace said, following her over. Isabella used her access card to get them in, and they entered the superhero hideout the boys had built. "You check over by the irradiator, Candace, I'll look over here by the Beak suit."

Isabella checked around the suit for some device that might be useful for tracking, but nothing seemed promising.

"Isabella, why don't you check inside the suit? Maybe they built something into it," Candace said.

"That's a really good idea! Thanks!" Isabella popped the suit open and climbed into the top section. It sealed around her, and she looked over the controls. "If I were a tracking control, where would I be," she wondered aloud.

A light on the panel to her left started blinking. Looking at it, she saw that it was marked, "Tracking". "Activate tracking," she said, pushing the button.

A small drawer slid out, and a soft computerized voice said, "Please insert genetic material for the person to be tracked."

"Open suit," Isabella said, hopping out. "Candace, you were right! There's a tracker in there, we just need to get some genetic material from one of them. I'll be right back."

"Okay, I'll go see if I can get something off one of their hairbrushes."

"Not necessary. I've got a lock of Phineas's hair in my room. Just be a second."

Candace blinked, looking at Isabella. "Why do you...you know, nevermind. I don't think I want to know. Just go get it."

* * *

Pinky silently dropped onto the roof of Professor Poofenplotz's lab, stashing his jetpack behind a air conditioner. He hooked a grapple to the ring around the bulding, then rappelled down to just above the windows. Dangling upside-down, he put a mini-periscope to his eye, peeking into the lab. The two boys were there alright, looking disgruntled as they worked on some new outfits for the Professor.

When they were all looking the other way, Pinky dropped down below the windows, then carefully cut a hole in one. Removing his fedora, he slipped inside.

Professor Poofenplotz, noticing the motion, looked up. "A chihuahua!" she said, alarmed, but when Pinky just stood there and shook, she calmed down and said, "Just an ordinary chihuahua, I guess."

The red-haired boy looked up, and whispered to his brother, "Hey, that looks like Isabella's pet, Pinky." The green-haired boy nodded.

"I think you should wander off to your home, little chihuahua," the Professor said. "Nothing personal, you just make me...a little jumpy. And I can't look my best if I'm overly stressed."

She started to herd Pinky out the door, then looked back at the boys, shouting, "Stop that!" at them.

* * *

Ferb had taken advantage of the chihuahua's entrance to try to sabotage the outfit they were working on, cutting the fabric to be far too small to fit the Professor. She'd spotted his change, though, and he found himself freezing in place as the necklace enforced her order.

Ferb could barely move his eyes, although he noticed that the chihuahua hadn't left, but had instead hidden itself behind a couch near the door.

"No, this will never do," the Professor said, looking down at the fabric. "You're going to have to start again, boys. Here, let me get you more material."

Ferb looked over at Phineas, whose eyes looked as agonized as Ferb felt. He'd have gladly helped this woman if she'd asked, but to be forced to assist sent unwelcome chills down his spine.

"Here you go," the woman said, placing a pile of fabric in front of Ferb. "Now, this time, _do not_ waste it."

Ferb nodded dully.

* * *

Perry idly waddled into the backyard, his mission for the day complete. Doof had been defeated, and Perry had gotten away scot-free. The Tofu-inator hadn't even gotten a shot off before Perry had hit the self-destruct. And now, his favorite part of the day...

He waited for somebody to say, "Oh, there you are, Perry," but there was just silence.

He looked around. The backyard was empty. That wasn't right.

His watch bleeped. He looked down at it, seeing Major Monogram's face. "Good afternoon, Agent P. Sorry to send you out on another mission today, but Agent Pinky went out to deal with Professor Poofenplotz this morning, and hasn't reported back in yet. We fear the worst. Please investigate and provide backup as needed. Your host family may be involved, so make sure your cover is not blown. Monogram out."

Perry put on his fedora and found his jetpack where he'd stashed it, then shot off into the sky.

* * *

The Beak suit flew through the city, its butt-jets leaving a trail of smoke behind it.

"Left," Isabella said, watching the arrow projected onto the HUD by the DNA tracker. Candace, controlling the lower half of the suit, steered it around a streetlight and down Central Boulevard.

"Hey, this is fun," Candace said, slaloming through the trees planted in the median of the boulevard.

"Can we be serious?" Isabella asked testily.

"But we're flying, Isabella. I never get to do this. The boys do, but I don't."

"Candace, we need to hurry, Phineas might be in danger."

"And Ferb," Candace added.

"And Ferb," Isabella agreed. "Now can we go faster?"

"I'm getting a feel for how to fly this," Candace said. "It's not as easy as it looks."

Isabella sighed. "Turn right up ahead," she said, looking at the tracking arrow again. Candace banked right, caroming off a stop sign and bouncing into traffic.

"AHHH!" Isabella and Candace screamed as they dodged between trucks. Candace wrenched the suit around, bouncing it off a building and then smashing through a billboard. Isabella's control board lit up with red.

"Candace, that hit damaged the left arm. I'm going to try to reroute power, can you _please_ keep us from crashing into anything else..."

Another crash reverberated through the Beak suit as they rebounded off the side of a delivery truck. The suit was filled with the sound of warning buzzers and flashing lights. "Sorry," Candace said, fighting the controls and trying to stabilize the suit's flight.

"Take us up," Isabella said. _Where there aren't as many things to hit._ "Left arm is out and I'm not sure if I can fix it."

"Do what you can," Candace said, "I'll go higher."

* * *

"See, I knew this spare -inator would come in handy. The Tofu-inator _was_ pretty lame," Heinz said to nobody in particular, pushing the Quiver-Inator out onto the balcony.

He looked around, waiting for a response, and said, "Perry the Platypus isn't here to thwart me, so now I can...take over the Entire! Tri-State! Area!" He sighed. "But it just isn't as much fun without Perry here."

"Gee, Dad, That Sounds Swell!" Norm said, coming out onto the balcony.

"Not you!" Heinz said, glaring at Norm. "But Perry isn't here, so there isn't anybody to thwart me!"

* * *

"Candace! Watch out!" Isabella shouted. They'd gone up above most of the buildings in town, but one oddly-shaped skyscraper stood out in front of them. Candace pulled up, and the Beak suit skimmed across the balcony on top of the building, knocking an odd piece of machinery off as it went.

"Sorry!" Candace shouted back as Isabella dealt with the damage-control board.

"Right arm is...still working," Isabella said. "Let's not hit anything else, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah..."

* * *

Heinz shook his fist at the retreating superhero suit that had just knocked the Quiver-inator off of the building. "Curse you...whoever you are!" he shouted.

"Now That That's Done, Dad, Let's Play Catch!" Norm said enthusiastically.

"No! I'm not your Dad," Heinz said as he moped back into the penthouse.

* * *

"There! That...spherical building there!" Isabella shouted.

"You're sure?" Candace asked.

"Magnify...I see them! They're in there!"

"Okay, heading for the window..."

As the window shattered from the impact of the Beak suit, the three people inside the room looked up in surprise. "Ba-CAW!" Isabella yelled, her voice modulated and deepened by the suit.

"Well, you're unexpected," the old woman said, looking up.

"What'cha doin'?" Isabella asked, causing the boys to startle. Phineas started mouthing her name, but stopped as the old woman said, "Boys! Defend me!" A large crystal on the other side of the room glowed blue, and the crystals on the necklaces the boys were wearing lit to match. Their eyes flashed a matching blue as well.

Slowly, as if they were trying to resist but failing, the boys moved toward the Beak suit. The suit stepped forward, bracing to fight, and Isabella raised the right arm defensively. Cautiously, Candace walked the suit forward one more step.

A floral lei sprung out from a nearby couch, wrapping itself around the suit's left leg. Candace tried to move the affected leg, but it was stuck fast in the trap. Isabella tried to push Ferb away with the suit's right arm, but he leapt up and jabbed a screwdriver into the elbow joint.

Red lights flashed all over Isabella's board. "Right arm is down! We are armless! Candace, get us out of here!" Isabella yelled.

"I'm _trying!_" Candace yelled back. "Activating jets...now!"

The jets deployed on the rear of the suit, but the trap held fast, and the suit was unable to break free. Ferb climbed up the arm as Phineas started to work on the right leg.

"It's the crystal! It's controlling them!" Isabella said. "Is there anything we can do?"

"Not if the boys take out the suit, no."

Isabella looked over her panel, desperately searching for something she could use. A red button off to one side blinked at her, and she smiled as she pushed it.

The front of the suit slammed upward as she shot forward, the ejection seat pushing her across the room. The seat bounced twice on the floor before it came to rest against a love seat on the far side of the room. Isabella unbuckled herself quickly and rolled out.

"Boys! Defend the crystal!" the old woman said, panicking. Phineas and Ferb turned from the suit, and Isabella could see Candace trying to work the suit free from the lei trap. Isabella ran toward the crystal, looking for controls or switches or anything she could use to turn it off.

There didn't seem to be anything there, unfortunately, and while she was looking, she suddenly felt someone grab her arm. She tried to pull away, only to find her other arm grabbed. Looking up, she was that Ferb was on her left and Phineas was on her right. Their eyes glowed with a blue like the crystal, but beneath that, she could see the pain in Phineas's eyes at what he was being forced to do.

* * *

Pinky watched frantically. He hadn't realized Isabella was in the suit until she'd ejected, and had frozen with fear upon seeing her flying through the air. And now she was being held by the mind-controlled boys, and Pinky had no idea how to get her free.

_Maybe if I can get over there and break the crystal_, he thought.

The boys were reluctantly dragging Isabella over toward Professor Poofenplotz, when she suddenly pulled her arm loose. She reached for the red-haired boy's necklace, but it shocked her hand when she touched it. Both boys cried out, and Isabella took the opportunity to pull her other arm loose. She ran toward the crystal again, and Pinky shrank back behind the couch.

* * *

Isabella could see that Candace almost had the suit free; she just needed to distract everyone long enough. She ran toward the crystal, but heard the boys running up behind her, so she dove off to one side.

The boys stood and guarded the crystal as she warily moved along the edge of the room. "If only I had something I could break the crystal with," she muttered to herself.

The boys were moving toward her again, and she looked over to see that Candace had almost gotten the leg free. With a grin, Isabella tried to lead the boys out of her way.

"Just surrender, girl, it'll make things so much easier," the old woman said with a sharp-edged smile.

"Candace, _go!_" Isabella yelled as the leg came loose from the trap.

* * *

Candace activated the butt-jets, and the suit shot forward, narrowly passing the boys. It smashed into the crystal, crushing the head section of the suit as it bounced off.

Candace saw a large crack in the crystal now, and she backed up to get another run at it.

"Boys! The crystal!" the old woman shouted desperately, and as Candace watched, the blue glow focused in the crack. With a sudden ***crack*** the crystal shattered, blue energy washing over the room. Candace fought to keep the suit under control as alarms blared and warning lights flashed; the blast blew the suit back halfway across the room.

* * *

Isabella watched as the boys suddenly fell to the floor like puppets with their strings cut; she ran over to Phineas and pulled at the necklace around his throat. It unlatched easily and fell to the floor, and he looked at her with a grateful expression. She gave him a quick hug, then ran to Ferb, who was already removing his own necklace.

"Thank you," Ferb said, and she gave him a hand up.

"You _fools!_" the old woman shouted in a rage.

"Let's get out of here," Phineas said, coming up behind her. Ferb and Isabella agreed, and they all ran toward the bottom half of the Beak suit.

"Climb on," Candace said, and they grabbed handholds in what was left of the top of the suit. With a cry of "Ba-CAW!" they leapt out the window, the butt-jets kicking in and carrying them toward home.

* * *

Perry approached Professor Poofenplotz's lair on his jetpack. _If she hurts the boys, I'll make sure she regrets it_, he thought. A bright blue flash filled the building, and Perry was momentarily blinded. When he could see again, he could see Isabella rushing over to help the boys. He smiled at that; Isabella was a good person in Perry's book. He could see Pinky, hiding behind a couch, shifting to help them if needed. He flew in through the shattered windows and landed next to Pinky, who nodded at him. Just to be safe in case the boys spotted him, he took off his fedora like Pinky had, then poked his head around the corner. He saw the remains of the Beak suit flying off toward home, three kids hanging onto it. With a savage grin, he stepped out from behind the couch, Pinky coming up beside him.

* * *

Professor Poofenplotz looked away from the shattered window the supersuit had flown out of, spotting the platypus and the chihuahua waiting for her. They were standing up but not wearing their fedoras, which puzzled her, so she said, "A chihuahua and a platypus?"

The two animals put on fedoras and stepped forward into fighting stances.

"Pinky the Chihuahua!? And...I'm sorry, I don't know your name."

The platypus stepped forward, handing her a business card that read, "Perry the Platypus. OWCA Agent P."

"Thank you, Perry." She cleared her throat. "Pinky the Chihuahua and Perry the Platypus!?" She sighed. "I'm afraid my plans have already been ruined, actually."

The two animals looked around and nodded.

"Are we done for today?" she asked, hopefully.

Pinky nodded, and after a moment, so did the platypus.

"Okay. Nice meeting you, Perry the Platypus. See you tomorrow, Pinky the Chihuahua. Pinky, can you show Perry the way out? I think I need to relax with a cucumber mask after today."

Pinky nodded, and leapt out of what was left of the window. The platypus pointed at his own eyes with two fingers, then pointed them at her before following the chihuahua.

"Curse you, Pinky the Chihuahua! And Perry the Platypus! And whoever was in that superhero suit!" she shouted after them.

* * *

The remnants of the Beak suit landed in the backyard. Candace let everyone off before piloting it back into S.H.E.D.

Phineas gave Isabella a hug. "Thank you, Isabella," he said. "I'm sorry about what we did..." She froze, unable to process the fact that _Phineas was hugging her_. He let go of her, looking at her nervously.

"Not your fault," Isabella said, shaking off her momentary panic. "That woman was using the crystal to control you somehow."

"I know, it's just..."

Candace came out of S.H.E.D. "You're safe again!" she shouted, rushing over to gather Phineas and Ferb in her arms.

"Thanks, Candace," Phineas said as Ferb sighed in relief.

"Aww, that's adorable," Linda said, coming out from the kitchen. "Candace, I didn't hear a thing about busting anyone all afternoon," she added proudly.

"Yeah, nothing bust-worthy today," Candace said as she let go of the boys and stood up. She ruffled Ferb's hair.

"Well, I think we're making progress, then. Anyway, there's snacks in the kitchen." She turned and went back into the house.

Candace followed her, with Phineas right behind.

"Thank you, Isabella," Ferb said as Isabella started to follow..

Isabella turned to him. "You're welcome, Ferb." She gave him a quick hug, which he returned. "Irving said to make sure you knew he helped."

She looked over at the chihuahua who trotted into the back yard. "Oh, there you are, Pinky."

Ferb looked at the dog, and raised a finger as if he was about to say something, then apparently decided not to.

* * *

Perry waddled into the yard a few seconds after Pinky.

"Oh, there you are, Perry," Ferb said.

Perry sighed contentedly. All was right with the world.


End file.
